Germans are more shy than you might think. That's the conclusion reached by experts at the BAT Leisure Research Institute in Hamburg.

Surprisingly, several surveys revealed that while there is a desire for more variety in leisure activities, the initiative is lacking. On the other hand, never before have so many leisure opportunities been offered, and never before has such a large portion of the population been able, both in terms of time and money, to take advantage of them.

More intensive qualitative studies revealed that fear of crossing the threshold is one of the main causes. Many people don't dare to go through unfamiliar doors, behind which sit unknown people who stare at newcomers with what they perceive as hostile stares. The fear of rejection clashes with their own reluctance to spontaneously make contact.

The research results clearly demonstrate a strong desire for new contacts. This desire could be easily fulfilled, especially through sports and leisure activities. However, another obstacle stands in the way: the fear of embarrassment, risk, or social standing. The situation is similar in the cultural sphere, where the fear of taking the plunge is often compounded by laziness. It's more convenient to watch television than to buy theater tickets.

The Leisure Research Institute therefore advises more courage in leisure time, more initiative and carefree attitude, the long-term reward of which is more intensively and satisfyingly used leisure time.

Living alone is often not a voluntary decision. This is not only true in cases where a partnership ended involuntarily. Rather, living alone seems to be a consequence of personal development in childhood.

As the BAT Leisure Research Institute discovered in psychological studies of over 300 people living alone, a strong attachment to their mother is characteristic of the majority of single people. This is especially true for unmarried people up to the age of 35, a group of people living alone who used to call themselves "eternal bachelors" and are now known as "singles".

The fantasy world of many single people is flooded with images of mothers and symbols of femininity. The dominance and size of these female figures is striking; single people perceive themselves as weak, even childlike, in comparison. This feeling usually stems from an early childhood fixation on the mother, which pushed them into the role of the "eternal child." From this attitude arises a number of subsequent phenomena in the outlook on life and leisure activities of single people:

• People living alone tend to avoid commitment.
• People living alone often found themselves in the role of outsiders during their childhood. They continue to play this special role later in life – more or less unconsciously. They avoid family ties and tend to evade any role expectations in their professional and leisure time.
• People living alone place less emphasis on strong gender roles. They exhibit blended tendencies, ranging from vaguely defined forms of "gentle men" to "tough women.".
• People living alone constantly perceive themselves as being in danger of losing their independence. Against this backdrop, their strong sensitivity towards any intimate relationship is psychologically understandable.
• Single people remain tied to their parents' home for life. Even in their free time, their family is emotionally ever-present. It provides closeness, warmth, and security. Especially on Sundays, the family becomes a kind of emotional substitute, filling in inner emotional gaps. Single people would rather suffer under the pressure of their family than forgo the intense enjoyment of the warmth of their childhood home. They recharge emotionally at their parents' house.

Freedom and independence above all else, activity and a spirit of adventure, a strong bond with one's mother and a longing for security: these are central feelings for people living alone. They fluctuate between euphoric feelings of freedom and fears of loneliness.